Monday, September 07, 2015

Not a Putz!

It was said I have no "filter" - however I speak my mind and stand up for myself. Trust me - My "filter" is on! Up to about 4 or 5 years ago - I was a putz. The journey out of being a putz has been difficult - but I made it! As a putz - I subjected myself to doing what was expected, doing as I was told - by the manipulative "boyfriends" and yes - even by family members. I kept my mouth shut and rolled with everything. Inside I was torn apart by the fact that I couldn't express my opinion, that I was afraid to stand up for myself for fear of "getting in trouble". I was a shell of a person who kept the peace and didn't ruffle any feathers. And I drank - alot. And I partied - alot. I think it was 4 years ago when everything changed. I was accosted by someone I knew in a sexual manner. I used to volunteer at an annual golf tournament. On the first day back, a 60 some odd year old man that at a minimum I considered someone I knew enough to know that he was a jerk - but I would laugh at his rude and corny jokes to go along with whatever he said. Because that wwas what I was used to . That was "normal" for me. On this hot June day at the golf tournament, this man took my hand and put it on his crotch and said "Is that big enough for you".... What a pig! But I pulled my hand away and didn't say anything and walked away. I didn't know how to handle the situation. I told one of my friends about what just happened. The next thing I knew I was filing a complaint with the police and the head of the volunteer committee for the tournament spoke with me. The man was escorted off property and informed he would never be allowed to volunteer again (after 25 years of volunteering). And then I went back into therapy. Because this incident revived in my head all the horrible things I went through with my first ex-husband "aka "Satan". I started having nightmares and flashbacks. I found a fantastic therapist and still see her today. She helped me work trough alot of issues. We did EMDR treatment to pull out the bad memories and learn how to handle them. I shared my history of the narcisstic abuse I put up with from my parents, family, and ex husbands, and boyfriends. I held nothing back. The only way to change WHO you are is to face the past head on and fight to change who you are. In these past years , I have learned to fight for myself. That it isn't healthy to bottle up my emotions, opinions and feelings. That it is good to stand up for myself. And I have the right to do so! I FOUND MY VOICE! So now I speak up - I express myself and my opinions. Most people are good with that and it has helped me find the love of my life. The first month I was with Jamey we shared all the horror stories of our past. The theory was that we would learn it all one day so why not just spill it all out now. And we accept each other for who we are knowing we both have done things in the past that are regrettable, rotten, stupid and so on. And we are moving forward with our lives. With truth, honesty, and joy and love. And I have family members that don't get this. They don't see the growth in me. They don't respect how I have evolved, how I have learned to express myself. How I have learned that I will no longer tolerate being ridiculed, put down, and belittled. How the next time some jack ass tries to force their sexual advance on me I now know to slap his hand and scream. And not cower and hide. I have the power to move forward and keep these negative people behind me. So I speak up and am no longer a putz. HOORAY FOR ME!!! once again , It was said I have no "filter". Trust me when I say that my "filter" is on! I don't always reveal everything I want to say , You are welcome for that. And I am no longer a putz!

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Thursday, July 23, 2015

Summer Vacation - Day 2

Yesterdays goals were mostly met. I worked until 4...somewhere in there I washed 4 windows, made SUNTEA in a 1 gallon jug.... At 4 I put on my headphones and Ipod and took a long walk around the hood. Then it was 5 and I was bored. Still no wheels so I walked to Bill's for happy hour. Jamey ws working until 10 or so - it was his last day at Moxie so I wasn't sure when I would see him. Terri joined me at Bill's and we had a snack a few beers....and I secured a ride home. I mean, it's only 3 or 4 tenths of a mile walk! But Rte 1 can be dangerous for the non-sober in the dark.... T & I sat at the beach for a while then went back tot eh cottage for a beer and lit the tiki torches on the deck and listened to music. She left sometime around 9:30 and I was enjoying the peace and quiet of the hood during the week 0 but I was getting chilly. First I changed into a t-shirt. then capri leggings. then a sweatshirt. Around 11 I finally decided I was cold and Jamey was not where closer to getting home from work. Contacts came out and makeup off while I waited for him. Finally at 12:30 I went to bed. He had texted a few times but I gave up. I was feeling lonely and very unhappy about it. So he gets home after having bourbon shots with the boys and we talked some until my bitch side popped out that I wanted to tell him about MY day and that I was lonely. Had a wee dispute until he hugged me and then listened to my day. This morning I was up by 8 firing up the laptop for work. I 'worked' while cleaning 4 more windows in the cottage and the rest of the dining room got douched...ceiling fan, walls, ceiling, floors. I killed oodles of spider colonies!!! So that was a big sense of accomplishment to get that room cleaned today. ... My vent about sharing the cottage today is: does anybody else clean this place?............ Jamey took off for a job interview and returned 4 hours later. Once again I got to feeling lonely and told him straight off. And that I am stressing over his family coming down to the cottage. Last night he told me that he invited the boys from Moxie to come here to party on Monday. SERIOUSLY? oh no one will come". right. and I am a natural blonde. I took a happy pill which finally is kicking in. He got a 'bra' for the Honda from some guy for $40 and installed that on that car - so now that car looks bad ass. Which is cool. Then we sat and chatted as he complained of a migraine....so where is he now? Taking a nap to get rid of the migraine. As I finish up work so I can power off and put on my OOO ( Out Of Office) message for the next week. Again feeling alone...this is getting to a regular habit this week ...and I am not liking it. Tonight I am heading up to Granby to see Lisa who is up from Granby visiting her sister. I really don't want to drive all the way up to GRanby but she did drive up from Virginia soooo..... Now I gotta call about the truck to see if it's ready or if I have to wait until tomorrow. Ugh. I miss my baby...my 2005 Dodge Ram 2500 SLT quad cab with a hemi! Only had it since March and it's a big truck but I love it! And lets see how long the man naps. OK - that is todays venting. I gotta head out around 5 and will be home ????? Vacation is starting in 4....3....2...1.......and go!!

Wednesday, July 22, 2015

Summer Vacation ~ 2015

WEll here I am settled into the cottage for the next 9 days! I do have to work today and tomorrow and am working with my laptop set up outside on the deck! Currently on a conference call and listening to the birds and the trees rustle.... Oh How I love it here!!! This is MY Vacation week here at the cottage - 47 Mohawk Road, Westbrook CT..... Daddy bought the place in 1973 and this is my real "HOME". I have lived here a few times in the summer while in between housing ( or wretched awful boyfriends - lol). Every summer I grew up here - getting up and down to the beach by 10 - hanging out all day on the beach with friends tanning and such. Then back home by 5:30 for dinner and showers and back out to the beach to hang out with friends. Or go to DQ , or the arcade.... or where ever!! Life was simple back then (We are talking late 70's into the 80's). But this cottage is my treasured home and I relish my time here. Finances being what they are - and now with my sisters and brother & I as the owners of record, I pay about $2,700 a year to enjoy the cottage. The past few years have been a struggle between the siblings with spending time here. Since I live a mile away it was presumed that "I can come here anytime" and "the others felt they were entitled to use the cottage all through the summer key months. This year we are doing something different, by splitting up the weekends in June and Terri & I get the cottage in July and Steve & Mary get it in August - through Labor Day. As typical, T & I are getting the short end of the stick but WE GOT JULY!!! So let's see how it goes. The rule/decision was that if it's not your month, you can pop in to use the bathroom. Which my brother and his daughter just did. I hope they don't come back. It actually puts me on edge thinking that they are nearby and may come back! I hope he doesn't intend on lounging around having cocktails or using the grill....argghhh...grrrrrr.... My vent about sharing the cottage today is: people do not shut the water off completely, so the water bill expense will be interesting to see what it is from last year. My plans for today? "Work" on the deck until 4 ish.... - possibly go to Happy Hour at Bill's with Terri.... - go for walks to the beach - set up croquette in the back yard - wash a few windows - make SUNTEA. And......I am off !!!!

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

The Dishwasher that wasn't.....

This is the saga of my attempted purchase of a dishwasher from Sears - and why I will never, ever, EVER set foot in that store again!

On 2/21/12, I purchased a Dishwasher at the Sears Outlet at 65 Holmes Road in Newington CT. The order itself includes a $139.99 delivery and installation and $10 hauling away of the old appliance.

The installation date was scheduled for 02/24/12 and I was told I would receive a phone call within 72 hours of the install with a deliver window.

1. As of 2/24/12 7:00 am, I received no phone call with a delivery window.

2. Approx 7:30 am I called the delivery number ( 800-341-2517) asking for a delivery window, sharing that I received no phone call and was told that their records show the installer would arrive between 11:00 am and 3:00 pm. I was told that they called the installer asking them to call me with a delivery window.

3. Approximately 12:30 pm, I called the Installation Number (800-497-4402) to verify the delivery and installation. It was confirmed. I was told that the installer would call about 20 minutes prior to arrival.

4. At 2:22 pm, I called the Installation number again for a status. I was told the installer would arrive by 3 pm.

5. At 3:35 pm, I called the Installation number again for a status. I was told the installer was running late and would be there by 4/4:30 pm. I stated that I have to leave by 5:00 pm to go to my second job. Again I was assured that the installer would arrive. And again the installer was contacted to call me.

6. At 4:48 pm, I called the Installation Number again, stating that I did not receive any calls from the installer and I was leaving in 10 minutes. Again, I was told the installer will be contacted and would be calling me to make arrangements.

7. I left at 5:00 pm and arrived home very late that evening. Checking my Caller ID and Voicemails, the installer – Patrick left me a message at 5:45 pm asking me to call him in regards to my dishwasher.

8. Saturday morning (02/25) at 9:45 am, I called Patrick with my information. He said he would call me back in about 10 minutes once he figured out where I was on the schedule.

9. At 10:14, (having not heard from Patrick), I called the installation number yet again. I was on hold for about 25 minutes before I was able to speak with someone. Around 10:50 am I was told that the installer would be calling me back within 30 minutes, that later in the conversation within the hour. I asked to have this issue escalated and to speak with a manager. As of 11:30 was still on hold and had yet to hear from the installer.

10. At 11:40 or so am, I sent the above information via this site:
http://www.sears.com/shc/s/nb_10153_12605_NB_CSeMail?i_cntr=1330188192487

11. At 11:56 am, the SEARS call line disconnected me.

12. I then Liked" Sears on Facebook and posted:
"I am only "liking" Sears to show my DIS-LIKE for their customer support and Installation services.”; which was followed up by a response from Sears Cares suggesting with an email address to contact. I gathered the above notes into an email and sent it off to SMAvisor@searshc.com. The Email attempts at 11:37 and 11:42 failed “Delivery to the following recipients was aborted after 1 second(s):”

13. Stated the above on my FB Sears post and was asked by SearsCares to try again, this time it went through successfully, I cc’s CEO Bruce Johnson on the email (bjohnson@searshc.com).

14. At 12:20pm, I received a response from Scott J. “ Thank you for your email. My name is Scott and I'm a colleague or Brian's on the Sears Cares Facebook page. I have already forwarded your information to our case management team. A case manager should be in touch this afternoon to assist you. We do look forward to speaking with you soon”.

15. At 12:31 pm I responded with: “Thank you - because at this point I am ready to cancel the order altogether. This is completely unacceptable Customer Service. I am hoping to reach some sort of resolution, but I leave for work at 5 pm and if this is not resolved by then, I will indeed cancel the order”.

16. As of 2:00 pm – I received no additional follow up from Sears.

17. At 2:15, I called the Sears store in Newington to tell them the story and spoke with Ryan. He was going to call the installer and call me back. I did not hear back from them that day.

18. At 3:10 pm, I called yet another Sears "issue line" that I found online – 1-800-326-8738, and after waiting on hold yet again, I spoke with Julie at 3:21 pm.

19. I told her the saga and she looked up my information. At 3:23 pm – Julie told me that the install rescheduled for Monday. I stated that is unacceptable and I want the entire order cancelled. I stated that at this point, I am not comfortable allowing these people into my home. Was told refund is handled by the purchase location.

20. At 3:25 pm – I was transferred to Newington store and put on hold until I spoke with someone and asked for Ryan to call me back.

21. At 3:35 pm, Ryan called me back and I told him I want the entire order cancelled. I suggested that we handle the refund over the phone so he could save me the trouble of driving 47 minutes up to the store to handle it in person, because I am sure he doesn't want me to arrive in person to get a refund. Ryan stated that he would call me back with a cancellation number. He never did.

22. Day 3 - Sunday - 11:00 am. I did not receive any phone calls from Sears after 3:35 yesterday. I did receive an email:
“from:Sears Holdings - Social Media Support Case Opened 3947360

Sent By:
searscares@customerservice.sears.com On: Feb 02/25/12 5:39 PM

Thank you for contacting Sears Holdings Corporation Social Media and allowing us the opportunity to address your concern regarding your recent experience. We sincerely apologize for the inconvenience you have experienced and we appreciate the opportunity to assist you.

Please be advised your issue is being addressed and case 3947360 has been opened. If you have any further questions, please feel free to reply to this email or contact us via phone.


Thank you,

Michell W
Social Media Case Manager
Sears Holdings Corporation
Phone: 888-572-8119 / Extension 26
Hours of Operation: Monday-Friday 8am-7pm CST, Saturday 8am-5pm CST

P.S. Your feedback is important to us! Click here to take a quick survey on your phone experience today.”

23. Sunday around 11:30 am I headed up to Sears, arrived approx 12:30 pm

24. I spoke with a Supervisor since no managers were in the store. Explained the situation and that I was there to get my money back. Was told that since the dishwasher is still in the possession of the installer, that I couldn’t get a refund. I firmly stated that since I waited for 2 days to hear about when they would install, receive no very little communication and co-operation from Sears, and that I spent over 6 hours on the phone the day before, that I simply was not leaving until I got my money back.

25. We went back and forth, her telling me how there is no manger on duty and I simply stated “That is not my problem. I am not leaving without my money back”
I said " Call him at home, call anyone, but I am NOT leaving without my money".

26. We stood there at the counter, her calling into the Sears main office, on hold for 40 minutes before she got thru.

27. Approximately 1:30 pm, my money was refunded.

28. The next day I received a follow up call from “Sears Cares” – wanting to know how they could make the situation better. I flatly stated that my relationship with Sears is terminated forever. She wanted to know what Sears could do in the future to assist other customers. I stated that they simply need to align their relationship with their installation and delivery team with their relationship with their customers.


The moral of the story? Don’t trust Sears. And you have to fight in this world to get what you want. If you purchase something, ANYTHING and are not satisfied, don’t settle, don’t let yourself be taken advantage of.

Back in a bit, I gotta go buy more Palmolive….

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Tuesday, March 21, 2006

March Marina Update


The dredging phase of PPEY is complete.....

Next up....





Brush the snow off the workboat....










Gather up the new pilings ......

and the new docks!!!

Sunday, January 08, 2006

Dredging in the New Marina Year

The Mystery is being solved! Gwendolyn has been working with her crew dredging Sunset & Sunrise docks!!!
Even while a sole fisherman heads out the channel to see what is biting.....

Sunset "Dock" has already been dredged.....








The open water will be home again to PPEY Sunset Dock customers!








Dredging over at Sunrise is under way.....





Peaceful and calm waters count the days until another boating season is to begin....

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

New Haven Coliseum - Oct 06 2005

Once upon a time the city of New Haven housed a locale for a myriad of entertainment....

Workers at the Knights of Columbus recall watching the circus animals be escorted in one by one and two by two...

The New HavenVeterans Memorial Coliseum was built in 1972. 33 years ago.

Did you know....that from July 1-9, 1995, the city hosted the Ninth Special Olympics World Summer Games.

The official address: 275 South Orange Street, New Haven, CT 06510. (203) 503-6000



Next month - January of 2006 - This building will be demolished with all it's history left to only the memories of those who sat in those red and blue seats.


New Haven Coliseum - Nov 16 2005

The demolition process began a few months ago....loong after efforts to save the Coliseum failed.
Jersey barriers and chain link fences began to surround the Coliseum on State, Orange, George & Oak Streets. The New Haven Knights of the United Hockey League, New Haven Nighthawks and Beast of New Haven of the American Hockey League all played there.....


did You know: The Coliseum was designed by the architects Kevin Roche / John Dinkeloo & Associates. The Coliseum hosted events from 1972 to September 1, 2002, when it closed permanently.
The final event held there was a Professional Wrestling show held by World Wrestling Entertainment....

The Parking lots for the Coliseum were constructed on top of the actual Coliseum itself.The New Haven marketplace found the approach to parking less than desirable upon the views of the quarter mile helical ramps ....

Street storefronts and an exhibition hall were never completed.
The Coliseum could hold 11,171 people at full capacity.

New Haven Coliseum - Nov 29 2005

The structure of the parking garages had deteriorated to the point where large canvas rectangles had to be attached to the outside to catch pieces of concrete which would occasionally drop off onto the sidewalk below.

The city shut the facility down after concluding that it was a drain on city coffers.

The city did not hold any public hearings, referendum votes, or conduct any legitimate surveys.



Several groups, local stakeholders, and the Coalition to Save Our Coliseum mounted a campaign to save and renovate the Coliseum.




While others in the community supported the plan to demolish the facility.

The city's plans to demolish the Coliseum will make room for a new downtown/Long Wharf redevelopment plan.


AS you can see from the photos I have taken since October......

most of the arena facility has been demolished in advance of the implosion.

From my view of the 18th floor from the Knights of Columbus, Myself and others watched the "claw" dig out the Coliseum from the inside.

Concrete was seperated from cold steel. Seats lay in piles of red and blue - leaving behind ghost of children, adults, teenagers from all walks of life with happy memories from the past.


New Haven Coliseum - Dec 11 2005







Then one December Day - the light of day could be seen clear through were heart of where the Coliseum once stood. The 4.5 acres of land is slowly opening up to a new era and in the infancy of a new Century.





I walked by the newly open air that day...and paused upon looking up at the blue seats in the corner above. I remember a day long ago....a summer when Terri, Marcia and I all held tickets to see J.Geils. For the most part - the "stories of that night" remain entrusted in the three of us - but as I looked up at those very stairs - the ones I "fell UP" after having WAAY too much Pepermint Schnapps - I had to smile. After falling up the stairs - I continued to dance the night away to lyrics such as:
" My blood runs cold
My memory has just been sold
My angel is the centerfold
Angel is the centerfold"

Ahhh....Good Times!! ( The rest of the summer I was on crutches! )




Who knew that one day I would work next door to this historic site. Where on Dec 9, 1967 the Lizard King was fined $25 for disturbing the peace.

"Blood in the streets in the town of New Haven....."


The Demolition will be upon us soon...most likely on an early Sunday morning.....


....stay tuned....

Stolen Marina

Once upon a time there was a marina - nestled in a corner of the Patchogue River in Westbrook CT . This marina has been known to locals and others as the EAST YARD of the Pilot's Point Marina.

Then one day...the marina slowly started to disappear......







Fingers and pilings disappeared left and right.....



What just a few months ago was a lively marina filled with boats, laughter and Martini parties galore.....was now just plain old open water......




Tommy W. begs the question: "Has anyone seen my marina??"


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